The Force Strikes Back!

Star Wars, as you all should know, came out on Jan. 31. This makes me happy. What also makes every red-blooded kid born in the late seventies happy is the Feb. 21 and March 7 releases of the other two re-vamped flicks. This should make you happy. This made a few hundred thousand people around the country happy, too.

But, as always there's another side to the whole thing. Part of me instinctively wants to spout some cynical response to this and be, well, all pissy about it. Like the "it's not even a good movie, just a 1977 special effects extravaganza," argument. That side of the arguement lasts almost as long as Greedo did.

Truth be told, I think that the whole shebang is somewhat representative of two of the things at the heart of our society and lives today, two reasons that a reasonably individualistic lifeblood screams through America. The mysticism that surrounds something which is but a year younger than me and has infused itself through everything around me. A "modern-time fairy tale." Swords and ships and bad-ass cute princesses and hints of incest and seven-foot tall growling shag-rugs and more. It's got it all, the good, the bad, the death sentence in 12 systems. It, as I said before, makes me very happy.

The other thing it has is a history of crass commercialism. If you don't believe me, think "Ewok" for a second. I'm not quite sure how I feel about that.

I'm opposed to the idea, but I'm in love with the reality. I'm the proud wielder of an $18.95 Darth Vader lightsaber from Toys R' Us even though I couldn't enroll for three days because of a lack of cash. Hell, I even bought energizer batteries for the thing because I thought the Star Wars commercial they had was cute. My friends are collecting the new, sleeker, 90's versions of the toys with a devotion usually found only in alcoholics and people who play Magic. If they started to sell crappy plastic versions of the stick Obi-Wan carried to scare off the sand people in the first movie for $18.95, I'd be outside the store at 6 a.m. with my life savings and a coupon. Any selection from the score makes my heart skip a beat and the mere thought of the trench scene brings a grin to my face and makes me wish I could say things as cool as, "We're going in and we're goin' in full throttle; that oughta keep those fighters off our back."

So the hyping of the movies have been going on from the instant Jedi left the theaters, so what? Think back to the Burger King cups (1980's precursor to Taco Bell's "feel the force" stuff), the Droids cartoon, iron-on patches. The fact that in 1983 they knew they were gonna wait until 19-goddamn-97 until releasing the first three movies. Everything, all meticulously planned out. Comics, novels, games, Shadows of the Empire. But I suppose that at the heart of the matter is that none of that really matters. At all. Star Wars is Star Wars, other things in the future will surely be compared to Star Wars, but no matter what, the original will live on in infamy - even if Hell freezes over and the first three movies of the soon-to-be sextology suck.

Maybe a better parable would be to compare the whole shebang to Darth Vader. In the beginning, the movies were good and plain old fun; the best way to spend Winter Term; a great way to think about Billy Dee Williams' and Mark Hamill's movie career.

But as time went on and the dollar signs increased, the whole deal slid to the dark side. The side of endless cheap products, the quick and easy. The question remains whether or not an Anakin Skywalker-esque act of redemption lies in the years ahead.

I doubt it, but I also don't care. They can't ruin it, because at base, it's still Star Wars, and in that respect cannot be tainted by the mere mortal world around it.

And even if that piece of English-major-writing is not true, I'll still go see Empire until I either run out of cash or they kick me outta the theatre. I'll go see Jedi in all of its speeder bike riding glory and after that, I'll find the theatre that has all three showing at once. At least 40 other Oberlin kids and I will embark on an all-night tempest of full-screen-THX-sound-trilogy.

I'll go see all three new ones to find out about the clone wars and Obi-Wan's youth. I'll even be first in line for the fated day when they re-re-re-release the original, non spiffied-up versions of the original trilogy for all of us anti-digital remastering purists that pop-up in 2015 or so. Because in whatever glossy form it may hold, the heart and soul of the movies will be able to draw $7.50 (or however much it'll soak us for) from my pockets. Always.

Nachie Castro is Managing Editor and refuses to believe Boba Fett is dead.