"I feel that my performance should be dedicated to the Dude of the Big Lebowski. Without him, I never would have thought to drink all those white russians before the tournament. And I think they were the direct cause of my good bowling."
In the NCAC women's lacrosse quarterfinals against Allegheny College, senior co-captain Kim Allen scored six goals and four assists in the Yeowomen's lopsided 17-3 victory. Allen and her teammates play Ohio Wesleyan this Saturday at Wittenberg for a chance to play in the finals and win their third consecutive NCAC title.
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Kim Allen (photo courtesy of S.I.D) |
In their final game of the season, the Yeomen hope to redeem themselves by beating Northwood University before an adoring home crowd.
Ariel is a college senior. In addition to being the intramural softball organizer and commissioner of the Tengen Baseball League, Ariel is a self-proclaimed "sports dork."
What exactly is a sports dork?
Sports think tank?
Sounds like you've got this down to a science. Do you plan to apply this athletic knowledge to a good cause?
Could you explain, even explore, the distinction between sport dorks and your generic dork? And, if there is a true dichotomy, could you elaborate on any possible overlap?Regular dorks are often not compatible with your typical social environment. Sports dorks are socially adept and attractive to women.
Do you actually play sports?
So you're saying you're not an athlete?
Ariel, cut the crap. The only thing you're good at is ping pong. Isn't that right?
What the hell are you talking about?
Yes I am, Ariel. Yes I am.
Copyright © 1999, The Oberlin Review. Contact us with your comments and suggestions.Marquee Event
Oberlin v. Northwood
Saturday, 1:30 p.m.
IN THE LOCKERROOM WITH...Ariel Evnine
There are two facets to being a sports dork. The first is a childhood fascination with and immersion in sports. The second is being part of a sports dork think tank.
A bunch of exceptionally intelligent sports dorks sit around on couches with SportsCenter playing continuously and we discuss the finer philosophical, economic, and political points of sports.We also apply for grants for said activities.
Yes.
Regular dorks are often not compatible with your typical social environment. Sports dorks are socially adept and attractive to women.
I played one year of reserve soccer.
No. That's not what I'm saying. I'm a top notch athlete.
Bongiorno Principessa.
Glenn, you are my princess.
This Week's Events
Volume 127, Number 22, April 30, 1999