Apology
For Offensive Words
To
the Editors:
I
am writing to address what appears to me as a misunderstanding between
myself and some students at the Take Back the Night Rally on Oberlin
campus on Saturday, Sept. 15.
I was called to be a guest to address some thoughts about sexual
assault. My concern is that students reading the article, Students
Respond to Allege Rape in the Review on Sept. 17 may see me
or the organization I represent (Lorain County Rape Crisis Center,
a program of The Nord Center) as being racist. My concern then,
is that any student who may be a survivor of sexual assault or rape
or having a history of sexual abuse may choose not to use our advocacy
and support services at the center with this concern. Because of
the emotion of the recent national tragedy I found myself that day
needing to comment with a comparison of the women in Afghanistan
and the crime of power and control in rape and sexual abuse. When
I spoke about the women in Afghanistan possibly feeling sun on their
arms and faces for the first time as the Taliban hide in fear of
American retaliation, I was not addressing Islamic culture or faith.
I did not mean to speak for Muslim women or their experience.
Four years ago, I met three Islamic women who shared their personal
stories of mistreatment by the Taliban regime in Afghanistan. The
following is a part of what I learned from them. The burga is a
garment that covers women from head to toe. The heavy gauze patch
across the eyes makes it difficult to see. Exterior windows are
painted in homes and buses carrying women have all their windows
covered with heavy blankets. Women are only allowed to leave their
home escorted by male relatives. The male speaks for her in public
so as to not sexually excite another male. In March the regimes
radio station broadcast to the nation that a young woman trying
to flee Afghanistan with a man who is not a relative had been stoned
to death. On another occasion it was announced that 225 women had
been sentenced to a lashing for violating the dress code. One woman
had the top of her thumb amputated for the crime of wearing nail
polish. The Taliban regime claim they are restoring Afghanistan
to the purity of Islam yet nothing Ive learned about the Islamic
culture or faith accepts the mistreatment of women. With that in
my thoughts I wanted to equate this mindset to the victim-blaming
so pervasive in our American society. The perpetrator is solely
responsible for sexually assaulting someone. Yet our society tends
to believe that somehow the victims behavior elicited the
sexual assault.
I sincerely hope, in some way, that this explains where my thoughts
and expression were that day when I was requested to speak at the
rally. I represent our center as a member of the Ohio State Anti-Oppression
Coalition. I, along with my peers at the Lorain County Rape Crisis
Center, am committed to the many gifts we have the opportunity to
receive presented by diverse communities. I feel that my comments
were misunderstood. However, even in that misunderstanding, I sincerely
apologize that my comments were received as offensive.
Kay Jones
Lorain County Rape Crisis
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