Preseason Prognistication: Same Old, Same Old

It’s that time of year again. Yes, with Major League Baseball’s spring training in full swing, it’s time for sports columnists across the globe to start making their preseason predictions, and as promised, your humble (or not so humble) Outside Oberlin columnist is going to have a go at it.
You know the drill. I’m going to run through each MLB division and predict the final standings, with the requisite witty (or not so witty) comment for each team. But as an added bonus for you, The Oberlin Review reader, I am going to predict the final record for each team, the wild cards, the winners of each playoff round, and the World Series winner. How’s that for service? (Just give me plus or minus five for the record, okay?)
I’m all out of ado, so without any more of it…
AL East
It’s kinda funny, you know? Whenever they do these, they always, always, always start with an East division, and usually the AL East. You want to talk about an East Coast bias? It starts with the predictions, I tell you! Regardless, far be it from me to break with tradition. So, to begin…
1. New York Yankees. You were expecting maybe the Devil Rays? Pitching staff is solid, as always, and Giambi puts them over the top. Record: 97-65.
2. Boston Red Sox. Don’t let the turmoil surrounding the new owners, new general manager, and eventual new manager fool you —this is the best Sox team in years, both in talent and chemistry. That’s not just my bias. Record: 90-72.
3. Blue Jays. The Jays will be competitive, but they’re rebuilding. Still plenty good to beat out the O’s and Rays. Record: 85-77.
4. Baltimore Orioles. Good-looking young pitching, but the Orioles just aren’t to the point where they can compete yet. Too bad they can’t fire their owner. Record: 70-92.
5. Tampa Bay Devil Rays. The Rays have occupied this spot every year that I can remember and I see no reason for that to change. Record: 63-99.
AL Central
There isn’t going to be much of a race in the AL East, so it’s up to the Central and the West to give us some excitement, and it looks like they’ll oblige.
1. Minnesota Twins. I’m putting my money (or lack thereof) where my mouth is. This is the pick relying more on gut feeling than any other. Terrific young pitching with potentially good offense. Record: 88-74.
2. Cleveland Indians. I actually like their offense a little better than the Twins’, and their pitching is good, but not quite good enough. Still, I expect this race to come right down to the wire. Record: 86-76.
3. Chicago White Sox. Experts say they’re going to be good, too. I agree, but I don’t get a good feeling from them for some reason. The pitching staff has young talent, but still a question mark. Record: 84-78.
4. Detroit Tigers. Still building. Record: 69-93.
5. Kansas City Royals. The talent keeps leaving and the pitching has never materialized. Last place again, and giving the Devil Rays a run for the worst record in the league. Record: 63-99.
AL West
This division’s actually gotten a lot tighter since last year. The Mariners won’t repeat last year’s performance, and might not be that close, and the A’s won’t win 100 again.
1. Seattle Mariners. They’re still on top, though I had a hard time deciding whether they were still better than the A’s. But they have a great offense and surplus pitching. Record: 96-66.
2. Oakland Athletics. Still have the young pitching, but the loss of the big Giambi really hurts the offense. Time to see if it’s their hitting philosophy that makes them tick or the players. Record: 89-73
3. Anaheim Angels. I really like their pitching staff, but I’m not sold on the offense. Should be competitive, but not enough to stay close to the A’s and M’s. Record: 80-82.
4. Texas Rangers. Chan Ho Park is not the answer to their pitching problems. Carl Everett and John Rocker in the same clubhouse? Still better than last year, though. Record: 74-88.
The Red Sox finish with a better record than the A’s to win the wild card, largely due to their easier division (other than New York). Yankees defeat the Twins in the Division Series in four games, while the Sox beat the Mariners in five. I know what you’re thinking: “Here comes that bias of his again.” Nope. Yankees beat the Sox in the ALCS in six games.
NL East
This could be another close race. The Phillies held first place for most of last season before fading at the end, and could be good again. The Braves and Mets, meanwhile, have both made big upgrades.
1. Atlanta Braves. It’s all about pitching. They still have Maddux and Glavine opening their rotation, and now they have Smoltz closing. Record: 91-71.
2. New York Mets. My, they’ve been busy. Alomar, Vaughn, and Burnitz really improve their offense, but they lack a dominant starter like a Maddux or Glavine. Record: 90-72.
3. Philadelphia Phillies. I like them a lot, but they still can’t compete with the big-spenders for the whole season. Record: 86-76.
4. Florida Marlins. Could be better than some would think. Great young pitching, especially if Josh Beckett blossoms, and the lineup can score some runs if they cut down on the strikeouts. Record: 79-83.
5. Montreal Expos. Major League Baseball is running the team. Major League Baseball wants to disband the team at the end of the season. How soon do you think they’ll starting trading the big names? Record: 64-98.
NL Central
Lots of sportswriters are predicting a good pennant chase and good baseball out of the NL Central, but for some reason it strikes me as a pretty weak division.
1. St. Louis Cardinals. They seem to be the most balanced team in the division — just enough offense and just enough pitching to do it. Record: 89-73.
2. Houston Astros. They still have the killer B’s in Bagwell and Biggio and they’ll finally be ditching the name Enron Field (which was always a horrible name for a baseball park), but it may not be enough to get them to the postseason. Record: 88-74.
3. Chicago Cubs. Kerry Wood and Jon Lieber at the top of the rotation’s a great start, and Sammy Sosa provides the thunder for the lineup, but there are too many question marks after that. Record: 86-76.
4. Milwaukee Brewers. By default. The next two teams have no chance of being anything but cellar-dwellers. Record: 71-91.
5. Cincinnati Reds. “Pitching? We don’t need no stinking pitching!” Record: 64-98.
6. Pittsburgh Pirates. Too many question marks, too many disappointments. The people of Pittsburgh did their part and paid for a new stadium. Now ownership needs to pay up and give them something worth watching. Record: 63-99.
NL West
1. Arizona Diamondbacks. They have Schilling and Johnson. ‘Nuff said. Record: 94-68.
2. San Francisco Giants. Surprisingly, Bonds is back. The rest of lineup is still solid (especially if Jeff Kent performs like he did last year) and the pitching is still good. Record: 91-71.
3. Los Angeles Dodgers. Kevin Brown leads an impressive pitching staff, but these guys are getting old, and they’re still overpaid. Record: 88-74.
4. Colorado Rockies. Not even Mike Hampton can pitch at Coors Field. Record: 82-80.
5. San Diego Padres. Their time in first place last season really was a fluke. Record: 70-92.
Giants win the wild card, while the Mets miss the playoffs despite being the fourth best team in the league. Diamondbacks defeat the Cardinals in five games in the Division series, while the Giants take the Braves in five. This one’s a tough call, but I’m going to say Giants in seven games in the NLCS.
I’m not taking any risks on this last prediction, though: Yankees to win the World Series (again) in six games. Besides, Steinbrenner wouldn’t tolerate two World Series losses in a row. So now you can sit back and watch it all unfold. But please keep in mind that these predictions are for recreational use only.

Violent Sport: Is It a Modern Form of Human Sacrifice?

Everyone knows that sports can be violent. This is simply an accepted reality. In fact, it is a reality that we not only accept, but that we revel in, glorify, and all-around enjoy the hell out of. The harder the tackles, the fiercer the hits and, on occasion, the bloodier the field, the happier we are as spectators. If we deny this, then we are at a loss to explain the popularity of games like football, hockey, and boxing, whose very essence seem to necessitate aggression, pain, and injury. After all, if we did not like the blood and gore, we could certainly choose to watch nothing but figure skating and tennis. Yet the irony is that even these latter sports have been proved to carry the seed of hysterical violence.
Perhaps it will not be too difficult to recall the infamous scandal involving figure skaters Nancy Kerrigan and Tonya Harding, in which, as you might remember, Harding was stripped of a 1994 title for obstructing the investigation into her possible involvement in a clubbing assault on Kerrigan’s precious right knee. Allegedly, this was a conspiracy to prevent the latter woman from gaining the national title. And, lest we forget, there is the case of the crazed fan of tennis great Steffi Graf attacking and stabbing Graf’s rival Monica Seles during a tournament in 1993.
And, though these incidents were not fatal, there are many other examples, involving other sports, which have indeed proved to be deadly. For instance, 44-year-old dad Thomas Junta was very recently given a sentence of six to 10 years in prison after a conviction of manslaughter for accidentally killing another father in a hockey rink brawl during their sons’ youth league practice. Both men’s children looked on helplessly and screamed for the assault to end.
These are the instances that remind me so vividly of our athletic heritage, recalling such literally life-and-death games as those found among the ancient Mayans at Chichen Itza and the gruesome gladiatorial events of the Roman empire. Amid the Mayans, there was a two-team competition utilizing a large rubber ball and something like sideways basketball hoops, through which players attempted to pass the ball without use of their hands or feet. Though there is still some controversy over whether it was the losing team or the winning one to whom the great honor was bestowed, it is generally accepted by experts in the field that at the end of the game, human blood was shed and lives sacrificed to Mayan deities. The outcome was often not very different in ancient Rome, where competitors were set against each other in death duels for the viewing pleasure of hordes of spectators, although the origins of these latter events are believed to lie in religious practices as well. More specifically, they are believed to come from old Campanian funeral rites, in which servants would vie for the privilege of attending to their masters in the afterlife.
It is thus clear that sports possess a somewhat brutal history, and so it is not a surprise to me that many sports are associated with brutality even today. It is the sort of thing that makes me wonder whether, to some extent, violent sports are not harkening to some ancient part of us, releasing an instinctual need for human sacrificial rites. After all, the outcome of a game does not ultimately matter. It is, supposedly, just a game, and despite this, these “games” drive crowds of people into frenzies of alternating joy and rage. Perhaps the ancients knew better than we the power of sport, the human propensity for violence, and the role that sport could play in harnessing that destructive power for first religious and, finally, entertainment purposes.
If this were true, it might say something about why such a disproportionate number of criminal athletes are granted leniency with regard to their violent crimes. After all, why should these athletes be punished for fulfilling their brutal duty? Examples of this are observable in such instances as the high profile O.J. Simpson trial. It is a thought-provoking instance of a beloved American football hero acquitted of a crime that, I am personally convinced, a man of fewer economic resources and less imposing public stature would surely have been convicted, whether or not he was actually guilty. Or let us take the case of Rae Carruth of the Carolina Panthers, who was convicted by a jury of conspiracy to murder his girlfriend, yet was acquitted of charges of first degree murder, even though he blocked his girlfriend’s car so that a hired gunman could shoot her. This leniency reduced his sentence from the death penalty to 19 years.
On the flip side of this, the notorious Columbine killers, during their horrific murdering spree, made a point of seeking out jocks to kill, which may be an interesting point to note if you hold that somehow human beings instinctually associate athletes with human sacrifice.
A final thing to consider is the level of spirituality that I have recently found among athletes. From track runners to bowlers, basketball players to tennis champions, nearly every one of the athletes with whom I have spoken in the past weeks, has cited that God, religion or spirituality has an important influence on them athletically. Some even testify to consciousness-changing, spiritual experiences during sport. And now it occurs to me that these are the same people whom the Mayans felt most comfortable sacrificing to the gods. Maybe the reason is obvious, that athletes are just so aggressive and brutal that society is better off without them, whether or not they have a special spiritual connection. Perhaps. Or maybe athletes are simply our violent ambassadors to that spiritual realm, our honored, war-like delegates to the Other Side.